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  • Writer's pictureSheila Norton

Monty's Diary: August 2023

Maddie: the 'Calendar Girl'

Hello, humans
It’s been a long time since I’ve meowed a new diary entry for my human carer – ‘Mum’ as she calls herself. (I know she’s only a human and not blessed with a Cat level of intellect, so I don't like to point out that she didn’t actually give birth to either me or Maddie. But whatever keeps her happy!). Anyway, she’s persuaded me to update you with our latest news. Beats me why she can’t do this herself, as she knows all our news well enough, and she’s supposed to be a writer. Anyone would think she was busy!

As you’ll know if you’ve read my diary before, Maddie doesn’t often get asked to help with this blog. She’s excused from such things because she’s too shy to meow in public – although you wouldn’t think it, the noise she makes sometimes outside in our garden! But as it happens, the news this time is mostly about Maddie. And although she’s my sister and I love her really, I do find it a bit irritating how she hogs the limelight at times just because she’s ‘sensitive’. I try to persuade the humans that I’m sensitive too, but they seem to find it hard to take me seriously because I’m usually asleep. Basically, I think my sister can be a bit of a diva at times, and that’s what made it all the more annoying when I heard her photo had been selected to be in a special calendar, and mine hadn’t.
We’d heard Mum talking about the photo competition that was being held by Chelmsford Cats Protection, which was where we were looked after before Mum and Dad brought us to our Forever Home. I was glad Mum was doing something nice for those kind people who looked after us when we were homeless, and I’d have liked to help her choose the best pictures of me and Maddie to enter into the competition, but she insisted on doing it herself. I could only hope they were flattering pictures that showed us at our best, because we are very good-looking cats, as you know.

So today, I heard Mum telling everyone she’d had a letter to say that one of Maddie’s photos had been chosen to feature in the Cats Protection calendar for next year. She started showing people the calendar and showing off about it. I gathered that neither of us had won the competition (so Mum obviously couldn’t have tried very hard) but this picture of Maddie was selected as a runner-up.

I went straight into my sulking place under the sofa and wouldn’t come out. Well, how would you feel? Mum says we should all feel pleased and proud about Maddie’s success, but I don’t understand. It must mean that there are other cats in the world who look more cute than us – and particularly, more cute than me – and I find this really hard to believe, as I’ve met quite a lot of cats around here and frankly, they’re nothing special! So I have to conclude that Mum is a rubbish photographer and has let us down badly. How disappointing.

‘Monty, I can’t believe you’re sulking because you’re jealous of your sister!’ she laughed at me.

Well, OK, fair point. But how would you feel? The thing is, Maddie can be difficult, whereas I try to be calm and no trouble to anyone. Well, OK, I just avoid being difficult by sleeping a lot. Here’s an example: Maddie broke out of the cat flap the other night, just because she wanted to get back to chasing some of the flying prey and hopping, croaking prey and scurrying, nose-twitching prey that you find in the garden late at night. It’s hard enough for Mum to find her and bring her in when it’s dark, but we all know that once the humans lock and barricade the cat flap from the inside, the fun’s over for the night, don’t we.
Well, on this occasion, Maddie not only managed to get back outside, she totally smashed the cat flap in her efforts to do it. Obviously there’s a possibility that she asked for my help, and being bigger and stronger, what can I do, if my little sister needs help? I suppose I might have thrown my weight against it . . . just being a kind brother . . . but neither of us could have foreseen the result. I hid, and went straight back to sleep, as soon as I saw the damage.
In the morning when Mum and Dad saw what had happened – and realised Maddie had gone back outside and stayed out all night, they were worried, and a bit annoyed too. Dad had to go and buy and new cat flap and it was difficult to fit it into the door. Maddie and I stayed out of his way!

Here's the new cat flap. It looks harder to break out of!

So yes, OK, I felt a bit jealous about the calendar. But I have to admit that Maddie, the diva, my difficult and ‘sensitive’ sister, is very pretty.
If I was choosing photos for that calendar, I guess I’d have chosen her picture too.

But as for me, everyone knows I’m just easy-going Monty, I’ll cuddle up to anyone and fall asleep against them, I sharpen my claws on the scratching boards like a good boy (not on the carpets like Maddie does) and I don’t meow my head off all the time like she does – it’s exhausting to listen to her! No, I just lie in comfy, quiet places and doze in an inoffensive manner. But am I appreciated for it?

Oh. Mum’s just interrupted me to say YES, I am appreciated! So that’s OK, then! At the end of the day, who needs to be a Calendar Girl, after all? Purr, purr, purr . . . snore.
Bye, humans. Talk soon. Love, Monty.
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2 comentarios

Marie-Gaye Barton
Marie-Gaye Barton
28 nov 2023

You are very handsome Monty, worthy of any calendar!

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Sheila Norton
Sheila Norton
28 nov 2023
Contestando a

Aw, meow, Marie-Gaye, thank you for recognising my handsomeness! You seem like a very nice, and very discerning human. Purrrrr! xxx

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