Monty's Diary, November 2020 : Sleeping
Hello humans. I want to meow to you today about sleeping (one of my favourite hobbies), and specifically about places for sleeping.
When Maddie and I first arrived in our Furever Home from the Home for Homeless Cats, you might remember me telling you how scared we both were. As soon as we were let out of our travelling cages in the kitchen, we jumped straight up onto the cooker, and from there, onto the top of the kitchen cupboards. We felt safer up there, where we could see what was going on but our strange new humans couldn’t reach us.
Of course, we’re not scared like that now – although Maddie still has her nervous moments – but we both still jump up on top of those cupboards to go to sleep every night. Mum keeps trying to persuade us to sleep somewhere else in the kitchen (the kitchen is our bedroom for night-times, as we are kept indoors at night with our litter-tray). She says she doesn’t like having to wipe our fur off the cooker every morning.
Quite honestly, I’d have thought that was a small price to pay for having two such well-behaved and beautiful cats to share their home with. We Ragamese cats have medium-long fur, we can’t help it, and they could always brush us twice a day if they find it a problem. I mean, why else do we keep these human servants if not to feed us and clear up after us?
We do have a ‘cat tower’ in the kitchen, and Maddie does like sitting on top of that. Sometimes, she’ll try sleeping on it – she says it’s quite comfortable. But I’m too big, and too heavy, I feel like I might overbalance and fall off it.
Of course, the humans also bought us really nice little beds when we first arrived. It took us a while to get to like them, but now we love them. We like sleeping in them during the evenings, while they’re watching moving pictures on that weird screen in the lounge. And we like kneading the fur inside them. In fact, I hate to say it, but we make quite a mess because of all the bits of fluff we claw off them while we’re doing that. We might need new ones soon. My problem with these little beds is, as I keep trying to remind Mum, I’m quite a big cat. I do end up having to get into strange positions in order to sleep properly.
And here’s the real problem. Mum and Dad originally wanted to put these beds in the kitchen, on the floor. The idea was for us to sleep in them at night, but we wouldn’t use them, and whenever they try again to encourage us, we still won’t. They can’t understand why we’d rather be on top of the cupboards. Isn’t it blindingly obvious? They’re putting the beds on the cold, hard floor. No self-respecting cat wants his comfy bed put on the floor! And they don’t seem to like the idea of having us sleeping on the kitchen worktops where they do all their food. Can’t see why not, personally.
Of course, it’s perfectly acceptable for us to sleep on the floor when the weather’s hot during the day. Even on the hard ground outside. That’s different.
And there’s nothing quite like a nice armchair with a couple of cushions for daytime naps.
But whatever time of day, whatever weather it is, we do expect our actual beds to be off the floor, on a nice comfy sofa, otherwise I’m afraid we’re not going to use them. Let’s be honest, how would the humans like their mattress to be on the floor?
And speaking of which: we find it quite sad that we’re not allowed in their bed, or in the beds they call ‘bunks’ in their other little bedroom, where the human kittens, who visit us sometimes, sleep. We’re not allowed in those rooms. We do respect the humans’ rules, because we’ve been brought up properly, and we love the nice life they’ve let us share with them. But – obviously – at any sign of a bedroom door being accidentally left ajar, we try our luck. Strangely enough, they usually laugh when they find us in there, and I have managed to get under the bedclothes a couple of times before being turfed out. It’s a shame, but there are lots of other nice places to sleep.
Mum says they did used to let their other cats lie on the beds – which seemed really unfair until she went on to explain that they didn’t always behave very well.
They made the sheets and pillows muddy, were sometimes sick on the bed covers, and the worst occasion, apparently, was when one of them brought a live mouse into the bedroom during the night when they were asleep, and it ran over Mum’s face. She makes a funny little shudder when she tells us this story – as if it were something really horrible. Personally, I can’t see the problem. If I had a mouse on my face, I’d simply open my mouth for it!
But still, I can see the need for co-operation with these humans in return for a nice warm home and plenty of food. But they just have to put up with us sleeping on top of the cupboards! Take care, humans, look after yourselves and especially your cats, obviously. I’m ready for another sleep now. Meow.